WOOT got into Manchester Uni :D

Results were quite good too. I'm happy with them overall.

Tired rite now from walkin around town all day with friends

 

Now i can live at home an go to Uni which is much more convienent than living away.

Once again WOOT lol

Yo, just back from Sccotland yesterday afternoon, covered in few scratches along my arm from a couple of mischievous cousins

Any way off to get results now after waking up with a slow start

Hopefully there good results :P

A woman is helping her computer-illiterate husband set up his computer, and tells him that he will now need to choose and enter a password that he wants to use when logging on.

 

The husband, thinking he'll be oh-so-manly, types in the following letters when prompted for his desired password by the computer... m - y - p - e - n - i - s

His wife rolls her eyes.

 

Then she nearly falls off her chair howling with laughter when the computer replies: PASSWORD REJECTED. NOT LONG ENOUGH

The teacher gave her fifth grade class an assignment: Get their parents to tell them a story with a moral at the end of it. The next day the kids came back and one by one began to tell their stories.

 

Ashley said, "My father's a farmer and we have a lot of egg laying hens. One time we were taking our eggs to market in a basket on the front seat of the pickup when we hit a big bump in the road and all the eggs went flying and broke and made a mess. "What's the moral of the story?" asked the teacher. "Don't put all your eggs in one basket!" "Very good," said the teacher.

 

Next little Sarah raised her hand and said, "Our family are farmers too. But we raise chickens for the meat market. We had a dozen eggs one time, but when they hatched we only got ten live chicks, and the moral to this story is, "don't count your chickens before they're hatched." "That was a fine story, Sarah."

 

"Michael, do you have ! a story to share?" "Yes, ma'am, my daddy told me this story about my Aunt Karen. Aunt Karen was a flight engineer in Desert Storm and her plane got hit. She had to bail out over enemy territory and all she had was a bottle of whiskey, a machine gun and a machete. She drank the whiskey on the way down so it wouldn't break and then she landed right in the middle of 100 enemy troops. She killed seventy of them with the machine gun until she ran out of bullets. Then she killed twenty more with the machete till the blade broke. And then she killed the last ten with her bare hands."

 

"Good heavens," said the horrified teacher, "what kind of moral did your Daddy tell you from that horrible story?" "Stay the fuck away from Aunt Karen when she's been drinking"